When we FINALLY landed in Rapid City on January 21 we were greeted by a homemade banner, balloons and roses from my wonderful family! There were many emotions flowing at that time in addition to tears. For 3 weeks there was no contact and for me, that was very hard! I am the type of person who has to talk (and talk and talk and talk) to at least one member of my family almost daily, whether it be by text, phone, e-mail or in person. Words cannot express how GREAT is to be HOME with friends and family!
While were in China we got to see some amazing sites like the Great Wall, The Forbidden City, Tienanmen Square and a jade and silk factory with other families who were also there adopting through Holt. As an extra treat to ourselves we went to a Chinese acrobatics show. Our hotel room was a corner room on the 15th floor. Beijing was gearing up for their Christmas and Chinese New Year so the city street was lined with blue lights at night it was just beautiful view from our room! The breakfast buffet was mouth watering to say the least! Just anything you could think of was there and was delicious!!
In addition to us, there were seven other families flying into Guangzhou on January 9. All of us would be meeting our babies the next day at 2 pm. There was a mixture of parents who were adopting again and first time parents. These amazing people become your "family" through adoption. Together we will be completing our adoption journey together.
After we got checked into our room and was all situated, I started freaking out. What am I doing? Can I do this? What if she doesn't bond with us? These were just a few of the questions racing around in my mind. Thank goodness there were others there who felt the same and some of them are parents already to either adopted and or biological children. That was comforting to know that I wasn't alone.
On the "GOTCHA DAY" I was surprisingly calm. When we finally got to the 8th floor of the Chinese Civil Affairs Building with our group, it was complete chaos! In previous videos we saw some sort of order but that was not the case. We did get video of our "GOTCHA DAY" moment but it wasn't as we had imagined it to be. But the video footage we did get was the IMPORTANT part - the hand off!!
Tia.... She is what the Chinese call "spicy" and she is that for sure! She has eight teeth (and working on cutting her back moellers), lots of hair and always has a big loving smile on her face! Even after she wakes up too! She was just learning to walk and it wasn't long before she was tearing up the hotel room! And like her mother, she's always chabbering away!
Since we all bonded so well in China, I HONESTLY thought everything would be the same when we got home as it was in China. Um, yea, NOT! I mean we are still bonded, but the house is not the hotel room. The hotel room didn't have 2 mini beagles who follow her every move or her own room with a much nicer and cushier bed. Home has all these new smells, new rooms and new people who are suddenly there wanting to hold and kiss on her. Something I'm sure she's not used to.
Home for me has also been a challenge. We all came home sick, me being the sickest. So you combine that with jet lag, hormones and lack of sleep you have a lovely combination for an emotional breakdown. Which I did end up having, in the car on the way home from the phamacy. It was definately long over due. I did feel better afterwards, but still......
We knew parenting would be hard. We knew it would change our life as we knew it. And we were accepting of that after 10 years of marriage (in July) and years and years and years of trying and finally waiting. But what we didn't know was how much of a change it would be. First time parents really just don't know or realize the change and there is no way of preparing for the reality of it. Of course we've babysat for my sisters and my mom does run a daycare, but these kids could be "sent home" when you had your fill. This is just not the case!
Then there are all the emotional fears and thoughts running through your head and the questioning of EVERYTHING. I am constantly texting my sister and asking her "what should I do" questions. And now with Sam back to work and it's just me, Tia and the fur-babies. I feel bad because I'm constantly getting on Sadie's case to quit licking Tia or Bandit to quit stealing her cracker. My poor fur-babies are constantly getting scolded and then Tia is constantly at my feet crying to be held. I pick her up she stops crying. After a few minutes, I put her down and she starts bawling. Up down, up down, up down and scold, scold and scold is all I do. Don't get me wrong, I love holding my daughter and my fur-babies, but I can't get anything done.
So that leads me to the subject of setting up routines. Which, by the way we are still struggling with! We've agreed on a bedtime and are very happy with the desicion we've agreed to. But now we're stuggling with naps. Should she take one and if so how often and how long? In the orphanage she took an 1 1/2 nap twice a day. In the hotel she did take an hour or two long naps, but since we've gotten home she hasn't. She's taken a few little "power naps" but nothing of great length.
Our daughter "fights" to stay awake. My sisters kids did the same thing too. But I am thinking that Tia is more determined as she will "nod off" while fighting to stay awake by crying. This is a daily thing. And once she does fall asleep, whether it's in your arms or on the floor when you pick her up to put her to bed she wakes up and it starts all over again. It breaks our heart! But we just kiss her good night and turn her cd player on and close the door behind us.
Once she does go to sleep, she sleeps through the night. A good sign we've noticed is that she's not "self soothing" herself as often as she did in China. In fact, I've not heard her do that in more than a week. So that has to say something! Right?
In China we met many wonderful people who now are friends. And although we are all scattered throughout the US, I hope we'll stay in contact with each other as we all understand what it took to get our babies and what it's taking to raise them!
Thursday, February 3, 2011
Sunday, December 26, 2010
OK got some things done, but not everything...
Oh what a Merry Christmas is was!! Santa was very good to us and we are very happy to have spent another wonderful, safe and magical holiday with our family! I've done alot and not sure where to begin....
Well last Sunday my sister came over and helped me pack Tia's suite case. Turns out I had a pretty good layout of what to take, just tweaked a few things. Then I remembered that I didn't pack bibs or a hairbrush/comb for her so I fixed that.
Nursery completed.
I bought the gifts for the orphanage - 2 outfits and some meds.
I got the paperwork all completed and organized.
As Sam and I sit down and talk about the most exciting changes that we are about to embark on, we come up with more and more questions. How should we pack our carry on bags? Should I pack mine, like I would if Tia was already with me? Do we really want to make extra copies of our paperwork (worried about lost luggage)? Do the airlines include the suitcase handles in their measurements?? And then there is the whole confusion of paying fees for checked baggage.....
So with all of these questions, we've decided to take our suitcase as is to the airport as it's just a few miles from our house and have them weigh it and then we'll pick the airlines brain! Problem solved!! Now, just finding time to do that......
I have 4 days left of work until I'm officially on maternity leave. I am so Blessed to have the honor to work for a company/firm that is allowing me the amount of time off that I'm taking. I couldn't of asked for a more awesome place to work for and really can't see myself working anywhere else! But it still hasn't really hit me yet that we're leaving in 2 weeks. However, we are getting more and more excited with every passing day!!
For me, there was a period of utter fear of "WTF am I/we doing??" I am assured that this is completely normal whether you're pregnant or adopting. This made me feel better but still wasn't quite convinced. Then I don't know what happened. I was having a daydream of Tia and her being upset about something and she's crying for me. I'm at her side in a heartbeat and soothing her tears. In that moment, a sense of peace and calmness came over me.
Of course I know that I will be doubting myself and have a fear or worry as we are raising her, but I know that will be a different kind of emotion than what I was feeling before.
But now I feel total and utter peace and calmness in my journey to becoming a mother for the very first time. I have totally love and excitement in the joy she'll bring to us and our families. I really can't put into words what I'm feeling, but I'm sure you all know what I mean.
Right now in this moment, I look to enjoy the last few weeks of just being a wife to my darling husband. We are looking forward of celebrating our last New Year's Eve together ending the year of 2010 as it started - just us.
This journey has taught me many, many things. Patience. Those who know me well, will agree with me that I am not a patient person. I want it done when I want it done. But this journey has taught me to have patience because it didn't happen when I wanted it to. But now I'm realizing that is the joy of life! The joy of God and his precious plan for us.
Well last Sunday my sister came over and helped me pack Tia's suite case. Turns out I had a pretty good layout of what to take, just tweaked a few things. Then I remembered that I didn't pack bibs or a hairbrush/comb for her so I fixed that.
Nursery completed.
I bought the gifts for the orphanage - 2 outfits and some meds.
I got the paperwork all completed and organized.
As Sam and I sit down and talk about the most exciting changes that we are about to embark on, we come up with more and more questions. How should we pack our carry on bags? Should I pack mine, like I would if Tia was already with me? Do we really want to make extra copies of our paperwork (worried about lost luggage)? Do the airlines include the suitcase handles in their measurements?? And then there is the whole confusion of paying fees for checked baggage.....
So with all of these questions, we've decided to take our suitcase as is to the airport as it's just a few miles from our house and have them weigh it and then we'll pick the airlines brain! Problem solved!! Now, just finding time to do that......
I have 4 days left of work until I'm officially on maternity leave. I am so Blessed to have the honor to work for a company/firm that is allowing me the amount of time off that I'm taking. I couldn't of asked for a more awesome place to work for and really can't see myself working anywhere else! But it still hasn't really hit me yet that we're leaving in 2 weeks. However, we are getting more and more excited with every passing day!!
For me, there was a period of utter fear of "WTF am I/we doing??" I am assured that this is completely normal whether you're pregnant or adopting. This made me feel better but still wasn't quite convinced. Then I don't know what happened. I was having a daydream of Tia and her being upset about something and she's crying for me. I'm at her side in a heartbeat and soothing her tears. In that moment, a sense of peace and calmness came over me.
Of course I know that I will be doubting myself and have a fear or worry as we are raising her, but I know that will be a different kind of emotion than what I was feeling before.
But now I feel total and utter peace and calmness in my journey to becoming a mother for the very first time. I have totally love and excitement in the joy she'll bring to us and our families. I really can't put into words what I'm feeling, but I'm sure you all know what I mean.
Right now in this moment, I look to enjoy the last few weeks of just being a wife to my darling husband. We are looking forward of celebrating our last New Year's Eve together ending the year of 2010 as it started - just us.
This journey has taught me many, many things. Patience. Those who know me well, will agree with me that I am not a patient person. I want it done when I want it done. But this journey has taught me to have patience because it didn't happen when I wanted it to. But now I'm realizing that is the joy of life! The joy of God and his precious plan for us.
Sunday, December 5, 2010
Packing - what a nightmare I'm making it!
So today I thought I would start working on packing Tia's suitcase. WOW! I always knew that I make things complicated, but this is an all new time high! Diaper bag? No diaper bag? How many bottles? I was thinking 6. Will that be too many or not enough? Clothes. That is another nightmare in it's self. Guangzhou is more "tropicle" with the average tempature of 58 degrees. Should I pack all winter type clothes or will short sleeves be ok too? Should I take a winter coat or heavy jacket? Oh I don't know.......
Friday, October 29, 2010
OMG - It's becomming so REAL
Well there has been some excitement and disappointment in the last couple of weeks.
The disappointment is that our church won't allow us to have the people we want to be Tia's Godparents because they don't meet the requirements. It is SO frustrating that one church is so strict and another of the religion isn't. We did think about going to the other church so we could have "our way" but Sam doesn't like that church at all. I understand and respect that. Rules are rules for a reason, no matter how much we disagree with them. So the search was on to try and find someone who we feel comfortable and confident that meet the requirements of the church and of course us.
But the hardest part of this was telling the person when we desperately wanted couldn't be Godparents. That was so heartbreaking for me as it was for them. My heart is still breaking....
After much debate we have solved our solved our dilemma on who will be Tia's Godparents, and I must say that we are both happy and proud that they have agreed! YEA!! Now that is all settled and done with we will have the baptism later in the summer when Grandpa and Grandma can come out for a visit.
Then earlier in this work week we received word that the Travel Approvals were on there way and that meant that the Travel Dates were right behind them! And folks we have them!!
Here is our itinerary for China:
January 6 Arrive in Beijing, China
January 7 Free day to recover from plane trip/jet lag
January 8 Holt orientation
January 9 Fly to Guangzhou, China (this is where the US Consulate is and happens to be the
same province that Tia is in)
January 10 Tia!!! We will FINALLY meet our beloved baby who we've dreamed of for so long!
January 18 US Consulate visa appointment for Tia's visa
January 20 Tia's visa is issued
January 21 Fly home
The days between the 10-18 will be filled with meetings, paperwork and the Adoption Finalization Ceremony. The thing I LOVE about Holt International is they don't leave you hanging. We will have an English speaking representative with us all the time. We will of course have some down time to ourselves to go shopping and or hang out with other families.
We looked at the temperatures for Beijing and Guangzhou and they couldn't be more different! The average temperature in January in Beijing is 28 and for Guangzhou is 58! WOW Which winter coat do I take??
I guess a sweatshirt, scarf, hat and gloves are a must!!
We are toying with the idea of doing a tour of the Great Wall. But after looking at the average temperature and the slope of the Great Wall, we're wondering if we should risk it. If I understand it right, we have to take a cable car - um yea that requires me to be OFF THE GROUND! I'm already worried about the 13-15 hour flight! I'm sure the flight home will be better as I'll have to focus on Tia, but the flight over is a totally different story! I want my mommy!!
Now that we officially know when we will be traveling to get our precious baby girl the reality is starting to sink in. There is no turning back now. I have all these fears and thoughts in my head. The main one is "WTF am I doing?" I know it's the "fear of the unknown" and that once we get her in our arms, our maternal and parental instincts will kick in but until then it's nothing short of fear/anxiety/excitement all rolled into one. I have been assured that this is all normal, however when I told Sam how I was/am feeling he looked at me like I'm crazy. Don't men have these same thoughts??
With the holidays just around the corner, Sam will be gearing up and will soon be starting to work the longer holiday hours. Between getting the store ready for Christmas season and his photography he won't have a day off to put the crib together until Thanksgiving day. On one hand I'm OK with that. On the other hand, I'm getting SO EXCITED that I want it done yesterday!
But honestly, it's working out for the best this way. It will be just enough time for me to work on getting the final touches and get our required documents together and start packing for China.
The BEST thing about these confirmed travel dates is now I can start buying the stuff we need to take to China for Tia. I've been kept on a very short leash but now I think it's safe to say that it's OK to start buying the baby meds, diapers, wipes, formula, bath for our trip. YEA!!
The disappointment is that our church won't allow us to have the people we want to be Tia's Godparents because they don't meet the requirements. It is SO frustrating that one church is so strict and another of the religion isn't. We did think about going to the other church so we could have "our way" but Sam doesn't like that church at all. I understand and respect that. Rules are rules for a reason, no matter how much we disagree with them. So the search was on to try and find someone who we feel comfortable and confident that meet the requirements of the church and of course us.
But the hardest part of this was telling the person when we desperately wanted couldn't be Godparents. That was so heartbreaking for me as it was for them. My heart is still breaking....
After much debate we have solved our solved our dilemma on who will be Tia's Godparents, and I must say that we are both happy and proud that they have agreed! YEA!! Now that is all settled and done with we will have the baptism later in the summer when Grandpa and Grandma can come out for a visit.
Then earlier in this work week we received word that the Travel Approvals were on there way and that meant that the Travel Dates were right behind them! And folks we have them!!
Here is our itinerary for China:
January 6 Arrive in Beijing, China
January 7 Free day to recover from plane trip/jet lag
January 8 Holt orientation
January 9 Fly to Guangzhou, China (this is where the US Consulate is and happens to be the
same province that Tia is in)
January 10 Tia!!! We will FINALLY meet our beloved baby who we've dreamed of for so long!
January 18 US Consulate visa appointment for Tia's visa
January 20 Tia's visa is issued
January 21 Fly home
The days between the 10-18 will be filled with meetings, paperwork and the Adoption Finalization Ceremony. The thing I LOVE about Holt International is they don't leave you hanging. We will have an English speaking representative with us all the time. We will of course have some down time to ourselves to go shopping and or hang out with other families.
We looked at the temperatures for Beijing and Guangzhou and they couldn't be more different! The average temperature in January in Beijing is 28 and for Guangzhou is 58! WOW Which winter coat do I take??
I guess a sweatshirt, scarf, hat and gloves are a must!!
We are toying with the idea of doing a tour of the Great Wall. But after looking at the average temperature and the slope of the Great Wall, we're wondering if we should risk it. If I understand it right, we have to take a cable car - um yea that requires me to be OFF THE GROUND! I'm already worried about the 13-15 hour flight! I'm sure the flight home will be better as I'll have to focus on Tia, but the flight over is a totally different story! I want my mommy!!
Now that we officially know when we will be traveling to get our precious baby girl the reality is starting to sink in. There is no turning back now. I have all these fears and thoughts in my head. The main one is "WTF am I doing?" I know it's the "fear of the unknown" and that once we get her in our arms, our maternal and parental instincts will kick in but until then it's nothing short of fear/anxiety/excitement all rolled into one. I have been assured that this is all normal, however when I told Sam how I was/am feeling he looked at me like I'm crazy. Don't men have these same thoughts??
With the holidays just around the corner, Sam will be gearing up and will soon be starting to work the longer holiday hours. Between getting the store ready for Christmas season and his photography he won't have a day off to put the crib together until Thanksgiving day. On one hand I'm OK with that. On the other hand, I'm getting SO EXCITED that I want it done yesterday!
But honestly, it's working out for the best this way. It will be just enough time for me to work on getting the final touches and get our required documents together and start packing for China.
The BEST thing about these confirmed travel dates is now I can start buying the stuff we need to take to China for Tia. I've been kept on a very short leash but now I think it's safe to say that it's OK to start buying the baby meds, diapers, wipes, formula, bath for our trip. YEA!!
Wednesday, October 20, 2010
Wednesday, October 20, 2010
Happy Hump Day! This week has been so long and stressfull but yet, it's going by fast! Work has been crazy busy and we received our paperwork to prepare us for travel. Man, is that ever intimidating and overwhelming!! I sent what I needed to send back today and I'm hoping and praying that I didn't forget anything or complete something incorrectly! Keep your fingers crossed!
Thank goodness the remaining paperwork is paperwork is paperwork that we have to take with us when we travel to China. So with that being said, I can take my time filing it out as most of it has multiple pages of instructions and sample pages.
Still haven't done anything new to Tia's room. Sam has been crazy busy too and so I'm hoping that the crib will get put together before the end of the month, but we'll see. My goal/dream is to have her room done by mid November so we can bring up the suitcases and start getting things ready. We have started "lists" (as recommended) and I still worry that we will forget something. And I know that Sam will complain that we're "taking everything but the kitchen sink!" He still hasn't either realized or accepted the fact that babies require a lot of stuff, but he will soon learn!!
Well I suppose I'd better hit the hay as tomorrow is going to be another long day at work - I need to find the bottom of my desk before Friday night!
Thank goodness the remaining paperwork is paperwork is paperwork that we have to take with us when we travel to China. So with that being said, I can take my time filing it out as most of it has multiple pages of instructions and sample pages.
Still haven't done anything new to Tia's room. Sam has been crazy busy too and so I'm hoping that the crib will get put together before the end of the month, but we'll see. My goal/dream is to have her room done by mid November so we can bring up the suitcases and start getting things ready. We have started "lists" (as recommended) and I still worry that we will forget something. And I know that Sam will complain that we're "taking everything but the kitchen sink!" He still hasn't either realized or accepted the fact that babies require a lot of stuff, but he will soon learn!!
Well I suppose I'd better hit the hay as tomorrow is going to be another long day at work - I need to find the bottom of my desk before Friday night!
Tuesday, October 12, 2010
Tuesday October 12, 2010
Today I got an e-mail notice that we will be getting a Fed Ex package/envelope by Monday with paperwork that help get us ready for travelling to China. Thank goodness we don't have to be present to sign for it so that is a huge relief for me as I don't want to have to take time off of work to wait around for it. Not that would be a bad thing, but I'll be taking 3 months of maternity leave and I have jury duty for the entire month of December. So I feel like I'm going to be gone too much. Now I know that is just guilt talking and my bosses (all 3 of them) are excited and supportive of my maternity leave, not so thrilled with jury duty though. To be honest, I'm not that excited about jury duty either. I think the jury duty/court trials is so fascinating that the other 2 times I've been summoned I prayed I'd get picked. But I work for an accounting office. I basically run the front office and I will be gone during the most important time of the year - tax season. So that means I have to train a temp to do my job and that will be hard to do if I'm gone on jury duty. I know that I can't help it and that it's my duty and that's fine. But the timing is just bad, that's all. But I'd rather have jury duty in December than when I'm on maternity leave! So I'm counting my Blessings!
Well Sam and I have registered for the Baptism class that is in 2 weeks (10/24). Thankfully we can take the class now and when we get home from China we can schedule her baptism. We're hoping that we'll travel by December 28, 2010 and be home by mid January. Our plan is to have my in-laws (who I adore and am very close to) here for her 1st birthday party (2/5), her baptism and my baby shower. I realize that is a lot in a short time, but they don't live here and I want them to be part of those very important moments. It is one thing that Sam and I won't concede on. We just want to make sure that our daughter KNOWS her Grandma and Grandpa Wellman regardless of the fact that they live in Ohio. With that said, we've made changes to our phone/cable/internet package to include unlimited free long distance calling. Now if I can just get my mom-in-law back onto the computer!! LOL
Well I'm happy to say that I have finally gotten all of my baby clothes washed, folded and sorted. I've gotten the 24 months/2Ts and older stored in totes. The 9-18 months are still sitting in the laundry basket. I need to just put them in her dresser. I'm still trying to figure out how I want to do that. Do I want to put all it all away like I have our clothes? Shirts in one drawer, pants in one drawer, shorts in one drawer, etc. Or do I want to put matching outfits together and then by seasons? I know that I am making this harder than it needs to be. That is what I do, which I am working on. That is probably why I haven't put all the clothes away yet. Good thing I still have some time to get that done!!
Hugs
Well Sam and I have registered for the Baptism class that is in 2 weeks (10/24). Thankfully we can take the class now and when we get home from China we can schedule her baptism. We're hoping that we'll travel by December 28, 2010 and be home by mid January. Our plan is to have my in-laws (who I adore and am very close to) here for her 1st birthday party (2/5), her baptism and my baby shower. I realize that is a lot in a short time, but they don't live here and I want them to be part of those very important moments. It is one thing that Sam and I won't concede on. We just want to make sure that our daughter KNOWS her Grandma and Grandpa Wellman regardless of the fact that they live in Ohio. With that said, we've made changes to our phone/cable/internet package to include unlimited free long distance calling. Now if I can just get my mom-in-law back onto the computer!! LOL
Well I'm happy to say that I have finally gotten all of my baby clothes washed, folded and sorted. I've gotten the 24 months/2Ts and older stored in totes. The 9-18 months are still sitting in the laundry basket. I need to just put them in her dresser. I'm still trying to figure out how I want to do that. Do I want to put all it all away like I have our clothes? Shirts in one drawer, pants in one drawer, shorts in one drawer, etc. Or do I want to put matching outfits together and then by seasons? I know that I am making this harder than it needs to be. That is what I do, which I am working on. That is probably why I haven't put all the clothes away yet. Good thing I still have some time to get that done!!
Hugs
Sunday, October 10, 2010
October 10, 2010
WOW!! What a week and a half we've had!! As most of you know we FINALLY got "THE CALL" about our darling precious baby girl that only took 4 years, 4 months and 11 days to get!!
Were to start? Well I had been checking the rumor site about the possible reality of it actually coming true. When I realized that it was true, I ran into the bedroom and woke Sam up out of a dead sleep and told him. His response was and has been "I'll believe it when we get the call from Ginger and have a picture in our hands!" I can understand why he had felt that way. After years of fertility treatments that failed, it was hard to get your hopes and dreams up.
So I was at work and I had been checking the rumor site and I had noticed that people in the eastern part of the US had received their calls. I was on edge, but I did manage to get some work done, surprisingly. It was about 3:40 pm Wednesday September 29, 2010 when Ginger called me on my cell phone. We started this dream 5 years ago and now it was coming true. I'm nervous and scared. I can feel my blood running. Cyndi and Naomi (my friends and co-workers and boss) are watching me as I'm getting the information of our baby girl. When I get off the phone they are at my side, full of joy and excitement. As they too have been on this journey with us. They have been full of support and encouragement!
As I'm sitting there, in total shock that "the call" finally came. They are encouraging me to call Sam. I tell Naomi that I would rather tell Sam in person. As I am being lovingly shoved out the door my mind is racing. I drive to Safeway and find a panda and "It's a Girl" balloon in the shape of a bottle. I run to my car and I'm trying to hold onto the balloon that is as long as I am tall without running into people and cars in the parking lot. Driving to the mall with balloon in the front passenger seat without causing an accident was a miracle.
When I finally walk into Sam's store, he's talking to some customers. Vanessa sees me and notices the balloon right away. When Sam's done and notices me I gave him the panda with the balloon tied to it. He looks at it and asks me "what is this?" He's looking at me, having no clue of what I gave him means. Finally he asked if I got "the call" and I tell him that I did. He's in shock. I tell him the information that Ginger gave me: her birthday, name and later that night we'll get an e-mail with her picture. We hug and kiss, and realize the long waited dream is coming true. He calls his parents and my mom. I call my sisters Debbie and JoAnna. Then I send out a mass text message to those near and dear to our hearts of the joyous news we've gotten!
Later that night, I get the e-mail that we've been waiting for. As my sister Debbie sits next to me (Sam had to work late that night) and her son Zachary next to her, we open the e-mail. Debbie's eyes fill with tears right away. I'm just sitting there, staring at her. Numb. In shock. I look at Debbie and she knows right away what I'm feeling and tells me "it's OK, you're in shock." I tell her I feel bad, and again she reassures me telling me that "this is totally normal and not to beat myself up over it."
As we send out the mass e-mail of Tia's pictures, the excitement is starting to generate. Hugs and tears and support all around as we are printing pictures of her.
Now that things have settled down some. I've been keeping busy washing and sorting baby clothes. I have been slowly working and organizing on Tia's room. I am now at a standstill until Sam puts the crib together and that will be a couple more weeks.
We've got one batch of paperwork done and am currently waiting for the second set. I'm not sure how much more is to do, but I am looking forward to tackling it. With that, work and everyday life I am hoping that the next 3 months will go smoothly and quickly.
Were to start? Well I had been checking the rumor site about the possible reality of it actually coming true. When I realized that it was true, I ran into the bedroom and woke Sam up out of a dead sleep and told him. His response was and has been "I'll believe it when we get the call from Ginger and have a picture in our hands!" I can understand why he had felt that way. After years of fertility treatments that failed, it was hard to get your hopes and dreams up.
So I was at work and I had been checking the rumor site and I had noticed that people in the eastern part of the US had received their calls. I was on edge, but I did manage to get some work done, surprisingly. It was about 3:40 pm Wednesday September 29, 2010 when Ginger called me on my cell phone. We started this dream 5 years ago and now it was coming true. I'm nervous and scared. I can feel my blood running. Cyndi and Naomi (my friends and co-workers and boss) are watching me as I'm getting the information of our baby girl. When I get off the phone they are at my side, full of joy and excitement. As they too have been on this journey with us. They have been full of support and encouragement!
As I'm sitting there, in total shock that "the call" finally came. They are encouraging me to call Sam. I tell Naomi that I would rather tell Sam in person. As I am being lovingly shoved out the door my mind is racing. I drive to Safeway and find a panda and "It's a Girl" balloon in the shape of a bottle. I run to my car and I'm trying to hold onto the balloon that is as long as I am tall without running into people and cars in the parking lot. Driving to the mall with balloon in the front passenger seat without causing an accident was a miracle.
When I finally walk into Sam's store, he's talking to some customers. Vanessa sees me and notices the balloon right away. When Sam's done and notices me I gave him the panda with the balloon tied to it. He looks at it and asks me "what is this?" He's looking at me, having no clue of what I gave him means. Finally he asked if I got "the call" and I tell him that I did. He's in shock. I tell him the information that Ginger gave me: her birthday, name and later that night we'll get an e-mail with her picture. We hug and kiss, and realize the long waited dream is coming true. He calls his parents and my mom. I call my sisters Debbie and JoAnna. Then I send out a mass text message to those near and dear to our hearts of the joyous news we've gotten!
Later that night, I get the e-mail that we've been waiting for. As my sister Debbie sits next to me (Sam had to work late that night) and her son Zachary next to her, we open the e-mail. Debbie's eyes fill with tears right away. I'm just sitting there, staring at her. Numb. In shock. I look at Debbie and she knows right away what I'm feeling and tells me "it's OK, you're in shock." I tell her I feel bad, and again she reassures me telling me that "this is totally normal and not to beat myself up over it."
As we send out the mass e-mail of Tia's pictures, the excitement is starting to generate. Hugs and tears and support all around as we are printing pictures of her.
Now that things have settled down some. I've been keeping busy washing and sorting baby clothes. I have been slowly working and organizing on Tia's room. I am now at a standstill until Sam puts the crib together and that will be a couple more weeks.
We've got one batch of paperwork done and am currently waiting for the second set. I'm not sure how much more is to do, but I am looking forward to tackling it. With that, work and everyday life I am hoping that the next 3 months will go smoothly and quickly.
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